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Change Starts In Your Mind!

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  As of lately I have been reading my Bible, praying, listening to motivating words, and applying new principles and practices to my life. I strongly believe that rebuilding and transformation is happening in my life. I have been doing the WORK, going to therapy and leaning into my spirituality. I am now brave enough to face the situations that have hurt me. I am feeling the hurt and finding HEALTHY ways to let it go.  These days I do not have much to say, I keep conversations very short. I have my crew that I express my emotions to because they are my safe spaces to do so but other than that I really don’t have anything to say. As I am healing I am realizing every “how are you?” is not rooted in love and I have to be careful not to be transparent with individuals who do not have good intentions. Part of the things that I am healing from is information I voluntarily gave thinking it was a safe place to share. It was a mistake that so many of us make. But if you are experiencing this ty
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Hi, it’s me, I’m the problem, it's ME!

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It is so hard setting boundaries with people who benefit from you not having any! I’ll say it again, IT IS SO HARD SETTING BOUNDARIES WITH PEOPLE WHO BENEFIT FROM YOU NOT HAVING ANY! I own a hair business that I recently had to take a break from. Hair has always been a passion. As a little girl I grew up in the salon with my mom. Now as an adult running my own business asking for my price has always hard. I always want to be fair so I often accommodate even though my work speaks for itself! This also goes for my standards and boundaries. I was scrolling through Instagram and came across a video that described pricing your products with confidence. She was responding to customers who would state that her prices were “too high”. She firmly stated that her prices were in fact NOT “too high” the individual complaining about the price was simply out of THEIR price range. She goes on to say, “My price is my price. It is not too expensive, it’s just out of your budget!” Me being me, found a c
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Your Are Not Okay, You’re Wear a Black Hoodie

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  Wooooohhhh Chile it pays to have friends who will tell you about yourself. As I walked to the car, hair tied, hoodie on, blue tights, a hospital band and dry ashy feet stuffed into my crocs. My shabestie addressed me with a,  “How are you feeling friend?”. I responded “I’m fine”. Chileeeeeee life is always lifing as an adult “if it ain’t one thing it’s another”. She responded, “Honey you’re not okay, you're wearing a black hoodie”. I turned to her and busted out laughing because you know what I’m not okay and that’s okay!  I have been running non stop for the past 3 weeks. My bestfriend visited me and cleaned my house from top to bottom, she bought me things for my house, prayed with me and we got the chance to sit and chat. I went from always being a car ride away to being 1,000 miles away but she doesn’t miss one beat in my life or her Goddaughters life and I am forever grateful. My sweetest friend had her wedding this weekend and I had the honor of being a bridesmaid. It was t
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CHURCH!

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  Attending church has been a part of my life since I was in my mothers womb. My first experience of God was through my mothers faith and prayer life. I saw her lose a car one day, pray and pick me up in another one the very next day. I’ve seen her keep lights on, heat on, food on the table and give me the opportunity to attend the best schools in Philadelphia, 8 to be exact, and a Jewish overnight summer camp (Golden Slipper Camp). I’ve seen people call my mom to pray and health reports have changed, financial relief happened and marriages stay together. For me I always followed the rules and regulations of the church culture, tried to tell the truth, Golden Rule, tithes and offering etc. but it wasn’t until my adulthood where I truly learned what and who God is to me.  After the death of my late boyfriend Rhyiad my strength in God was needed. Till this day I have no clue how I survived such a heartbreaking moment in life. The grace God gave me was unmatched. I had church people pray
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Bag Lady

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  Bag Lady, you going to hurt your damn back, carrying all these bags put ‘em down!       Erykah Badu’s lyrics to her famous song Bag Lady went something like that. These lyrics have been resonating with my spirit. I’ve come to realize that carrying baggage is why life seems so heavy. To help me reveal some of the baggage I have been writing down things that I have to release in order to return back to an easy life:  Everyone’s emergency is not my emergency.  I am not God. I am a Christian.  You cannot help people who do not want your help or do not think they need help. Learning to discern the difference between an assignment and assassination.  Understanding that I do not have to change parts of me in order to keep the peace.  Pay attention to patterns and not empty promises.  Embracing that I am a giver while simultaneously disconnecting from takers who have no intention of reciprocating with the same urgency as they take.  Casting ALL my cares (baggage) at the Lord's feet for H
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Time, Truth, Freedom

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WOW! I haven’t blogged in so long! Life has been lif-ing! But here I am trying to fulfill the promise that Shabestie (Shannon, shameless plug check out her blog: Its All Down Hill After 25 ) and I made at the beginning of the year. My thoughts have been racing around my head as usual. I’ve had the pleasure of having some deep conversations about different perspectives of life. So this blog is about those different topics that I’ve been discussing lately. Please comment, like and share your thoughts and opinions.  To begin I would like to share with you where I currently am spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and physically.  Spiritually: I have a 6 day streak going on in my YouVersion Bible App so I am super proud of myself.  Mentally: I am in a space where I don’t recognize myself, I am having difficulty finding my voice and being secure in my decisions.  Emotionally: I am numb! My boundaries continue to be challenged and or ignored completely.  Physically: I am in a great space. He
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LETTER TO MY BLACK FATHER

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       Morris, my dad, has always had big dreams for his children. He has worked non stop to try to get us everything HE wanted for us. During our family meeting he took the opportunity to apologize for not showing up as a “better” father. He did not try to justify why he didn't; he stated that he did the best he could and he hoped that it was enough. Little does he know my brothers and I think he did a phenomenal job considering the lack of fathering and experiences he had to work with. However, hearing a genuine “I’m Sorry” seemed to heal years of resentment.       My dad is the realest man I know! To know him is to love him! He is honest about his strengths and weaknesses. He does not live by “fake it till you make it”, his hustle is unmatched! He is always finding ways to make money. He values helping his family and giving back to his hood, 3Y2. Now my dad’s way of doing things has been very one-track minded. He is what you would call the “Master of Tunnel Vision”. He sometimes
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